Lucid Waking

“Not much between despair and ecstasy”

we had ten years left on earth

    “It seems as though I’m glimpsing things through a bubble of time and no one can stop the ride to let me off. Life is passing me by, but I can’t seem to stop long enough to notice that we’re in a bubble in space and the only things we had left, we took for granted. ‘We have ten years left on this earth. Are you ready to face the consequences?’”
    He glanced at her in the fading light. Her blond hair was reflecting back the orange light in a copper glow and her skin shimmered in an otherworldly way. She was standing in the sand looking out at the ocean, now filled with mountains of garbage islands. A dark cloud of pollution reflected the color of the sunset as a ceiling above the earth.
    “Eventually we’ll have to evacuate. We can’t possibly stay here.”
    She wrapped her thin arms around her body and took a deep breath, immediately hacking up the particles in her lungs. The breath of his oxygen mask hummed as he rhythmically breathed in and out. The machine buzzed and he turned to empty out the carbon that accumulated in the tank. She fell over in the sand and gasped for air, pulling up handfuls of sand in her fight for oxygen. He bent down beside her and in one fluid motion pulled the mask over her mouth and nose. She screwed up her face in sorrow, but he could hear her gasp for air as the oxygen quickly whooshed into her mouth.
     “We have to get out of here,” he echoed, his voice far away, yet resonant. He waved his arm over the landscape to present his point. “We’ll stowaway.”
    Earth was left to the people too poor to pay for a ticket to the space colony on Mars, the closest colony to Earth. Most of the people left had managed to swipe gas converters and now lived in anarchy under all of the trash, burrowing away from humanity and accepting this hell.
   “Thank goodness there are still flights left.”
    “Only to take species that have still survived up with them. I hear there’s a zoo on Alpha-Apollo.”
    She nodded and pulled at the straps of her mask. “I can’t live like this. We tried, but no one would listen and now all they do is run away from the problem instead of fixing it. Damn it!”
    She coughed again, but pushed him away when he tried to replace her mask. “I don’t care if I die.”
    All he was left to do was watch as she hacked up blood doubled over on the sand, her gas mask around her neck and still pumping out oxygen.

The Bride

So, like I do from time to time, I was checking out the blogs I have linked to and I’m excited that Annie has updated, because she has a creative blog like mine, and I read:

Kay, this idea came from reading a post written by my friend Brianna at http://lucidwaking.net/. She’s a really awesome writer and I liked her story so I wrote one similar from a different point of view. So, I give her full credit and hope she will not be mad at me.

Why would I be mad? It’s awesome someone liked my work well enough to write something to go with it. And so, with her permission, I have republished her work. (She’s talking about this post)

    The girl entered the room with her head held high. She wore a beautiful off the shoulder dress and heals that clacked with every turn. Her hair was done up in intricate rings and lips shown red. But, despite the careful hours of primping, no one turned when she entered the room. There was no hush of awe when she descended a staircase, no rush of young men eager to make her acquaintance. She was not beautiful. Her nose was too big and her lips too thin. She wasn’t even pretty. The girl watched her fiance turn away at her entrance, watched him duck behind a nearby pillar. Let him go. She thought cynically; let him have one last fling. What do I care if he can’t stand to dance with me, he will still marry me. He needs the money and the title. Let him go. He would come to terms with her face, as she had, long ago. He would learn to stifle the instinct of disgust, stifle it until it no longer existed; as she had learned through long years of pain. She may not be beautiful, but she was stunning. The girl watched her fiance from the corner of her eye as she drifted across the dance floor. She watched him skulk in the shadows until he disappeared out of the door. He was dancing with the dark haired beauty. She knew it in an instant as if she was there watching. The girl closed her eyes and danced with her fiance while he stared at her with eyes full of admiration. She moved through the steps, wrapped in the day dream until the song ended. She blinked in the sudden light and moved to the door. Silently, the girl watched as a man and a dark haired beauty climbed off the patio and disappeared into the night. She felt a single tear role down her powdered cheek as the two figures vanished together. For once, just once, she wished she could be beautiful. Finally, the ugly girl wiped her cheek and returned to the party. For, the woman might be a beauty, but she was the bride.

Read the Captions

           Bold and black the letters on the newspaper headline struck her heart like an arrow: “Wife kills husband and refuses to explain.” She stopped and shakily picked up the paper. The picture on the front was a fuzzy black and white picture of a woman being escorted away by the police. She was dressed in a business suit and appeared to have light color hair in layers. She was staring straight ahead at the open door of the police car. The woman in the paper looked just like her in the other pictures. She put the paper down and tried to walk away.
           “I know what you did,” the note had said and its words rung true in her head, now. “And I’ll give you one last chance to change or I’ll make sure you can never do it again.”
           The cause was only a small side affair that had lasted a couple months, and she honestly had no idea he was married. She should have known, though. Before he told her about his marriage, she would imagine herself being Mrs. Hartland, wife of the most famous undefeated lawyer in the country. Then after three months, he broke the news to her and only a little time after that, the notes started pouring into her mailbox. Then, they were small pieces of paper tucked into her car door, post-its on her desk and emails that had the identical address to a very good friend of hers. She had lived her life in fear of the worst until she saw the headlines and surprisingly now that she thought about the situation, the pit in her stomach started to lighten. She had thought her life was on the line, but now she realized she wasn’t in danger of being killed; Mrs. Harland was referring to her husband’s life. She had a strangely ghastly thought that she would do it again if she knew what her options were. Heck, she thought with disdain, if I knew he was going to get killed for this affair why should that concern me? She stopped in shock at her macabre thoughts and walked into the park. She sat down on a bench with a shudder and pulled a novel out of her purse, trying to calm herself down.
           Someone was watching her from the roof of the nearest building. The red dot on the top of her head flashed briefly before he pulled it. His shot rang true and he quickly crouched down below the edge of the building’s roof as people’s screams and yells could be heard from the park. He crawled back to the door and ran down the stairs to his apartment two flights down. He picked up the paper from the table and tossed it into the garbage can. “Poor dear,” he thought with a smile. “She didn’t read the caption; it wasn’t Mrs. Hartland being arrested it was Mrs. Cohn.”

Late Night Telephone Calls

Originally published on December 11, 2005

           She sat at the maple kitchen table with the telephone near her elbow and a book in her hand. Her head rested on her other hand and her eyes were half closed. The hands on the clock on the wall facing her were almost together pointing up. The telephone rung barely once before she picked it up.
           “Well?” she whispered forcefully, clenching the receiver with both hands. Her blue eyes were wide open and staring at the chair next to her.
           “Perfect.”
           “I’ll see you tomorrow, you know when, at the East Café in Buckingham.”
           She hung up the phone and fingered the spine of her book. A crooked smile crossed her lips as she stood up and replaced the phone on the edge of the counter closest to the door. She set her watch to noon and placed the book back on the shelf in the living room.
           Megan had heard the entire conversation. She knew she shouldn’t have picked up the receiver and if her mother knew she was awake that late, she was a goner for sure. But, there was nothing for her to do the next day but to somehow skip school and spend all day at the East Café waiting for her mother and whoever it was that called.  

Train Ride

Originally published on December 10, 2005

I had an interesting prompt today: write about seeing someone for the last time. I just saw Rent and the first thing that popped into my mind was Angel. So for having sensory overload and being forced to go to sleep, here’s what I could come up with.

            There was something not quite right about that last Saturday; the clouds were a slight green and the wind was warm and wet. They were waiting for the train, which was ten minutes late for once. She wore her usual black raincoat and blue jeans, but he was dressed up in his best suit, standing up so that he wouldn’t get a spot on it from the benches. The rain started falling in sheets, but they barely noticed as the train pulled up to the station. It had a yellow glow about it, but neither seemed to notice. She gave him a stiff hug before he got on the train and it quickly flew away.

Beauty and the Bride

            He watched her slowly move across the floor. Her dress was low cut and strapless, her skirt reached down to the floor in a train, but she wasn’t beautiful. Her make up did a poor job trying to convey the beauty within that did not shine through her face. She reminded him of a bean pole and he turn in disappointment. This was his bride.
            Luckily she hadn’t seen him and he hoped he could avoid her for the rest of the night. It was rude to hide from her and her family, so he went about looking for a dance partner. When he was forced outside to hide, he bumped into another girl. She was beautiful and was very surprised to see him outside. She laughed and allowed him to dance with her. She knew how to dance, but suppressed it as he led. They spun in and out of the other dancers on the dance floor during every song. He didn’t notice his bride see him and leave to the courtyard sobbing. Neither did the beauty. At the end of the evening they snuck off to whisper sweet nothings to each other until dawn. And then he was back in reality and stuck with the Bride instead of the Beauty.

The Sea’s Gold

            Gold is the color I remember. I don’t know why. It must have started with the sun on the water every morning. Sure that would make me late for my chores, but there was nothing stopping my heart from joining the sea.
            I had managed to finish my chores early and was sitting by the sea shore as I always did watching the waves clamber onto the sand and leave a mark where its wet fingers grasped for the sand to stay just a little bit longer. It was sitting close enough for the foam to just barely caress my feet while I stared at the black water under the horizon. And suddenly there was a subtle wash of blue underneath the water, but I didn’t notice it until much later when it was closer. The foam dragged me into the water and I found myself getting up and when I was chest deep in water watching an iridescent blue shape flash in and out of the surface range of the water and getting larger. I instinctively took off my clothes and stood in the waves letting it engross me. It wasn’t a God that you read about in Greco-Roman mythology where at this point I would be used as a pleasure source for his own loneliness, but I felt a calling in the sea for me to join it. After all, it never wore clothes and modesty was a trivial mortal emotion that it never understood. All this I got from the movement of the waves and its crashing song within itself. Then I was pulled under and air streamed into my primitive lungs. Because that’s what they were, only meant for air and not all of the minerals in the sea.
            I wasn’t truly frightened until this point when I couldn’t feel nor move my legs. I panicked and thrashed wildly against something warm and human-like. And when I opened my eyes, there was someone I related with who had the same trusting love of the sea and he was stuck here in his love for the rest of his life. I recognized him as one of the fisherman’s sons who had disappeared months ago. It didn’t matter who he was, just that he was in this prison with me and we would both have to deal with our decisions that our hearts had made for us.
            We could speak, but I didn’t want to. I was not sad for joining the sea, or for leaving my parents behind, but I had pangs of great emotion when I looked up at the sun and what I left was the air on the land. So, gold is the color I remember and the color I envy for each day. Perhaps it will save me when the time is right and bring me up into its golden haven. Or perhaps not, as it knows I would be unhappy there also. There is so much time to think when you have nothing to do each day but to avoid falling prey to the predators of the sea. We just travel with the current and hope to find something new and unusual for us to explore. But it’s a very large world.

Mabelle’s Perfumery

            She wasn’t too fond of perfume, but she loved to go into Mabelle’s Perfumery. She loved how each showcase was scented in themes and if you were looking for a flower scent, you could go up to a case, open up the sample and try it. If you didn’t like it or had been there a while, she had baby wipes and unscented lotion for you to return your skin to an empty palate. She preferred the food scents and would often go in and try warm vanilla and pumpkin pie before guiltily tipping them and leaving the shop.
            On her birthday, there was a sale and she thought that she could convince her parents for some money to buy a bottle. The shop was not very full as usual and full of warming bees wax candles on the counter. A couple ladies were trying on new scents, but she walked up to the food cabinet and opened it up. She ran her slender fingers over labels: vanilla, apple spice, pumpkin pie, chocolate and more.
            “Perhaps I can suggest something new,” a small saleswoman said behind her, making her jump.
            “Um…”
            “Maybe you would like the smell of fresh watermelon.”
            She held out her hand for a little squirt on her wrist and inhaled deeply.
            “Peppermint.”
            She sampled it and shook her head.   
            “Sun warmed strawberries?”
            She raised her eyebrows in slight surprise. The saleswoman smiled and squirted just a touch on her other wrist. At once she was transported to the middle of her childhood strawberry patch. She was sleeping in the sun with the barn cat after trying to stay awake looking at the clouds.
            “Elodie, you’re going to have to go to the United States. Papa and I can’t support you, so we’ve sent money with you to Uncle Paul. He’ll take care of you. I’m so sorry, Elodie but I don’t want to lose you if we have to give up the farm. I want you to be happy.”
            She snapped back to consciousness. “I don’t think so.”
            The woman nodded understandingly. “Water lilies seem to have a good memory for you.”
            Elodie was too depressed to comprehend what the woman said and allowed herself to be led across the shop to the flower scents. The sales woman wiped off one wrist with a baby wipe and placed it in the garbage under the display. She sprayed Elodie’s wrist lightly and waited for her to smell it.
            She was in Normandy again getting her master’s degree in art history. Such a useless degree, she had thought at the time, but she had loved the learning process never the less. She was sitting on the edge of the pond that inspired Monet’s water lilies and resting her head against a tree nearby ingesting all of the scents and sounds around her. He sat next to her and they didn’t talk, but just sat next to each other and observed everything.
            Happiness. “That’s a good one. I’ll get it.”
            The saleswoman smiled and nodded ringing it up and trading her the moderately sized glass bottle for her money. She left the shop and went down to the golf pond’s edge to sit. She pulled out the bottle of perfume and sprayed just a little bit on the collar of her turtle neck so she could feel like she was in Normandy again.

Once Upon a Time (No. 2)

            Well, what do you want to know about my childhood? I suppose I could start at the first memory. My father was a rich landowner who was also an advisor to the throne. I don’t remember my mother, just that one day my father mentioned that she had died and that she wasn’t coming home. I think I was five or six when I asked. I knew my father left and would come back occasionally on different errands for the king, so wouldn’t my mother come back one day? The only mother I ever knew was Clara, the nurse. She was somewhat young compared to other nurses (one day she told me she was twenty three) and would always take care of me when my father wasn’t around. I connected more with her than Father.
            One day my father came back and announced that he was going to get remarried. I was twelve at the time and still incredibly naïve to think that the woman my father would marry would be just like Clara. When I actually met her prior to the wedding, she seemed all right enough. She told me about her two daughters, one my age, the other a year older and said that I would finally be happy with other girls to play with. Besides, it would do well for me to see an example of a happily married relative, when she could find a suitable match for her girls. Her tone was sickly sweet and honestly made me nauseous. But there was nothing for me to do to stop father from marrying that woman. I believe her name was Angela, but I had never called her that.
            I suppose I should pause to tell you that my father when he wasn’t out in the name of the king was usually sick at home, which was another reason I bonded so well with Clara. My new mother and her “lovely” daughters arrived the day my father would come back from an errand and only Clara and myself were home. Just about the first thing she did after ordering Clara around the house to get things ready for her new husband’s arrival, was fire the poor girl. Just as Clara left my father came home. He ignored my complaints that Stepmother had fired Clara and smiled to my two new sisters: Mary and Tiffany. He seemed to fawn over how lovely and behaved they were before going upstairs to take a nap. It was unusual, but I didn’t think much of it, as I was too busy feeling rejected and lost. Later that evening my new stepmother came out to tell us that he had died in his sleep. That’s when everything changed. She had a devilish aura around her and her eyes seemed to smile behind her solemn appearance. She never did cry about it and neither Tiffany nor Mary seemed terribly upset about losing a second father. I suppose it was because they didn’t know him, but that didn’t seem too logical as they saw him every week before their mother married him. For weeks after that I would have nightmares of Her coming at him with a kitchen knife. I never saw the body to see if my dreams were true. Well with Clara gone there was no one to do any work around the house so little by little she added more chores for me to do and less for her daughters. Since I would constantly cry myself to sleep, She said I was crazy and stupid, not fit to be taught as a noblewoman. Two years later her excuse was I was not fit for the wife of a king and I didn’t figure out why until months later. The serving girl, Rachel told me about a masquerade ball that the king and queen were having at the palace. They were desperate to get their son married, as he was already very old at sixteen years, so they invited all of the women excluding servants to the party. Parents were invited also to insure no vulgar behavior. (The last part she heard straight from the messenger, who had been friends with Rachel and wasn’t afraid to tell her exactly what he felt about the whole thing. But I could figure that the king and queen would never add the last bit in an invitation.) I was never told about it because I was considered a serving girl, when anyone could tell you I was not. No one else could read and write and I was also well versed with poetry and could play the lute. No other servant can brag of such an education. I had three days at this point to figure out how to get there. I had never seen nor met the prince so I must admit I was thinking of this marriage as a way to please my parents and get myself out of this horrible mess. I was used to the idea of marriage not for love, but for government and legal purposes, so regardless of whether he was a nice person, I needed him to get me away from here and possibly rise up in society. Then I would never have to deal with this horrible place again and for my father, raise a child to be heir to the throne. Quite a wonderful possibility if I could pull it off. Which is why I was not surprised when I went to town the next day that the dress shop was overflowing with women. I wouldn’t have the money anyway to buy a dress. I stopped on the way home at the bakery where Clara lived, whom I learned is happily married to the baker. He was a widower and happy to let Clara work at his shop. So it was no problem for him to marry an old maid like Clara, so long as no one knew she was never married. She was very pleased to see me and we talked for a while. (I had told Rachel in advanced I would be making this trip and she told me she would do my cleaning chores and gave me an extra long list full of rubbish so that it would look like I was busy all day.) She decided to help me and we measured my size and went to the dress shop to buy material. She promised me the dress would be ready three days from then and I should come back as soon as I could.
            I do talk a lot, don’t I? Sorry, but there is a lot to tell. At the day of the party I was tied up with quite a bit of cleaning. I helped Tiffany and Mary get ready and cleaned the house until glowed. Mary was the eldest so I had to make sure she looked extra pretty. The poor girl is color-blind and I ended up getting whipped because she insisted on a hideous orange frilly dress. Such was the way most of the time. The party had started by the time I ran to Clara’s. She had the dress ready as promised. I have to describe it because it took my breath away. She had a simple design of a straight white dress with no decoration and the skirt was open in the front to reveal a dark blue satin skirt with a stitched design of flowers. She had sewn fitting sleeves underneath large dropping white ones and decorated the opening of the skirt with lace. It took forever to get into getting all the wrinkles in the right place and smoothing out the fabric, pinning some things here and there. We put some ceruse and fucus on and she gave me a mask she had traded to the artist down the street. I don’t know how she managed to get it to fit perfectly but she tied it on with blue satin ribbons, so it wouldn’t slide down my face. Clara had also figured out that she and her husband would escort me as my parents. They were both dressed and they escorted me to the party. The entire time my heart was beating like a puppy’s, so I’m not sure what happened. We were introduced and I hung around smiling and mingling with some of the people there. I never knew there were so many girls in the town, some of them younger than me. I do remember dancing with the prince though. He wasn’t terribly handsome, but when he smiled I got a terrible case of nerves and my stomach trembled. He had such a beautiful smile. Anyway, when people started leaving, I thanking him for a wonderful time and I thanked the king and queen on my way out. I didn’t realize that my family had recognized me until I got home and I was whipped several times for being insolent. My fear for the rest of the night was that they told the king and queen I was a servant girl and I would be looked down upon for sneaking in uninvited (although technically, I was not).
            A couple weeks went by before I was called upon before the court. My stepmother was in such a state of shock she went about as a ghost, letting me borrow Tiffany’s dress and shoes and arranging a coach to take me to the palace. I wasn’t sure what was happening either, but I made the best of it and bathed in fresh hot water and did my hair and makeup. What had happened was the king had found out from someone that I lived in his old advisor’s house and had wondered if I was his daughter. Apparently word had gotten around that I was a servant. Thankfully he recognized me and I told him about the misunderstanding. I tried my best not to make my family seem as bad as they were because even though they treated me badly I would still have their deaths on my conscious and I didn’t want that. If it was arranged that I would marry the prince, it didn’t matter if they were alive or dead.
            The marriage was set up with the prince and I’m now queen. My education came in handy because I was tested to see if I was royalty and passed quite easily. I didn’t really tell you about my childhood because I was fourteen when this happened, but anything prior to that was trivial. Well I hope that tells you everything you needed to know. Oh, my name. Ella-Carissa DuPont. Well, Queen Ella-Carrissa.

The Cat and the Lady

Originally published on December 06, 2005

            Fiona sat at the window combing through her soft black hair. Her gold eyes would occasionally glance at the kingdom below in a gesture of indifference at the people. Her nights were full of restless hours and the days seemed to be getting longer as winter approached.
            “Your highness,” one of the new guards knocked gently and opened the door. She shifted and gave him a dirty look.
            “I’m so sorry,” he said looking down at his feet.
            She looked down her shortened nose bridge at him patiently. Her tail tapped the edge of the chair in an effort not to show her annoyance.
            “Lady Worthington requests your presence at dinner tonight. She wishes to speak to you. She would not say what it was about.”
            Fiona nodded and sent the boy on his way. She shifted back and locked the door. She sighed and glanced out and the white cloudless sky. The birds were flying in a single direction, not in their usual haphazard way, as black pearls heading south. The line of trees out the window turned black in the light, the points of their trunks stabbing the non descript sky. She grabbed her dress from the table and put it on over her head.
            “Tonight?” she whispered as she put on the blue velvet. It fit close to her body and she inhaled to make it fit. A lady must be of perfect proportion, she had drilled in her head. “Lady Worthington, what could you want to possible talk about tonight?”